So how do you go about getting your child to listen to you? The answer may surprise you. It’s not about yelling louder or using bigger words. It’s actually about learning how to talk to them in a way that they will understand.
The first step is to break down what you want to say into one sentence. This will be your key message.
For example, let’s say you want to talk to your son about coming home right after school so he can get his homework done before playing video games. You would break the discussion into two parts. One part is that he can come straight home from school and spend 30 minutes on his homework and the second part is that he can’t play video games until his homework is done.
Your key message would be: “When you come home after school, we need to get your homework done first, and then you can play games.”
The next step involves using a one-sentence story to get your point across. This story should be about something that happened to you or someone you know.
For example, let’s say you want to talk to your daughter about picking up her toys. You could use the story of a friend of yours who had to clean up after her messy children.
Your key message would be: “My friend has two kids and they never pick up their toys.” It makes her so angry that she has to clean up after them.
The final step is to ask your child a question that will help them think about what you’ve said.
For example, if you want to talk to your son about doing his chores, you could ask him: “What part of playing video games do you like?”
This question will get him thinking about the fact that he gets to play games, but he won’t be able to if he doesn’t get his homework done.
Now that you know how to speak your child’s language, start talking. It might not happen overnight but you will start seeing a difference in your child’s behavior if you stick to it.